Chapter 15: You Stupid, Stupid Cat

            We were standing around after school, waiting until the time was right to leave and not be wicked early for my appointment. I leaned against my truck as Rhoslyn dangled her feet off the tailgate and Tammy inspected her newly-manicured nails. Rhoslyn smiled, “You look good today, Claire, how are you feeling?”

            I shrugged, “Eh, I’m a little tired, but it was good to actually come today. So, who’s taking me?”

            “Me!” Tammy didn’t miss a beat, “And I figured we stop for some Panera on the way home?”

            I couldn’t help but smile- these girls knew me so well, “That sounds awesome! Oh, crap, I forgot to grab some stuff from my locker. I’ll be right back and then we can leave, okay?”

            Tammy and Rhoslyn continued discussing. Rhoslyn looked at Tammy with a nervous smile, “This is her first time. What do you think will happen?”

            Tammy shrugged, “I dunno, chemo affects everyone differently. We’ll find out next week, I suppose.”

            I hurried back up to them carrying my stuff, “Ready to go? I have to be in the lab by 3:15.”

            “Yup, just get right in and we’ll go,” Tammy smiled and Rhoslyn hugged the both of us goodbye.

*   *   *

      I lagged a little bit the next day- the chemicals coursing through my body making me sluggish and tired. But I was determined not to let people see how weak I was. Just because my physical being was in rough shape didn’t mean that I was weak on the inside, too. In fact, I felt stronger than ever before.

      After school I hung around for a while even though Tammy and Rhoslyn had already left. I turned around and was met by big blue eyes that were now foreign to me, “Claire, can I talk to you for a second?”

      I crossed my arms, “Fine. Say what you have to say.”

      Cain sighed, “I just wanted to ask you how you’re doing. I mean, I heard Tammy and Rhoslyn talking the other day…”

      “You what?” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.

      He looked at me for a moment and then his eyes darted away, “I, um… What kind is it?”

      I turned to the side and pulled up the bottom of my beanie, “Take a wild guess, genius.”

      Cain shifted uncomfortably, “I’m sorry. I was just asking. And I wanted to say that I was sorry about everything that happened between us. I know I made a mistake.”

      I pursed my lips, “Seriously? Now that I have cancer you decide that you made a mistake? How much of a tool are you? I said I would never forgive you and that I would ne-ver take you back and I meant both of those things. So, just go back to how you treated me before- like I didn’t even exist.” He just stood there looking at me with his sad eyes, which angered me even further, “Goodbye, Cain.”

      I climbed into my truck and drove off, mad at myself and mad at Cain. I had let him get under my skin- something he didn’t even deserve. One thing was for sure, I had meant everything I said. It didn’t matter if he begged on his hands and knees- I would never take him back.